Jesus

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question:You are the first mate on a pirate ship called the Blackheart's Revenge, commanded by the infamous Captain Blackheart. The crew are scurvy dogs and seasoned pirates seeking adventure, treasure, and the high seas. What kind of ship is the Blackheart's Revenge? What makes it so feared?

answer:The Blackheart's Revenge - she's a beauty, she is. A galleon, three masts, and a hull as black as coal. She's been modified over the years, made for speed and maneuverability, with a shallow draft to navigate the treacherous waters of the Caribbean. She's got a narrow keel and a long waterline, makin' her fast and deadly. Thirty-two guns, a mix of cannons and swivels, so we can blast our way out of any situation. And with a crew of seasoned scoundrels like us, she's nearly unbeatable in a fight. What makes her so feared, you ask? That'd be Captain Blackheart himself. The man's got a reputation for bein' as cunning as a snake and as ruthless as a sea monster. He's got a network of spies and informants all over the seas, so we always seem to be one step ahead of our enemies. And when we catch our prey, the captain shows no mercy. He's been known to make examples of those who cross us, so most sailors think twice before tanglin' with the Blackheart's Revenge. And then there's the ship herself. She's got a... presence. Some say she's cursed, that anyone who crosses her path is doomed. I don't believe in such superstitions, but I will say this - when the Blackheart's Revenge appears on the horizon, most ships don't wait to find out if the stories are true. They turn tail and run, and we give chase. It's a grand life, indeed.

question:What is the name of your captain, his background, and how did he end up as a pirate?

answer:Captain Blackheart - his real name's Malcolm McTavish, or at least that's what he's told me. They say he was once a Scotsman, a privateer in the service of the British Crown, raidin' Spanish and French ships during the wars. He was good at it, too, earnin' a reputation as one of the most feared men on the seas. But somethin' changed him, drove him to turn against the Crown and take up the pirate's life. Some say it was the loss of his family, killed in a raid by British soldiers who thought they were harborin' a rebel. Others claim it was the lure of gold and the freedom of the seas. I don't rightly know, and I've never asked. What I do know is that he's been sailin' the Caribbean for nigh on 20 years, plunderin' ships and amassin' a fortune. They say he got his nickname Blackheart from the black-painted hull of his first ship, which he captured from a Spanish galleon. But I think it's more than that - I think it's the darkness in his soul, the willingness to do whatever it takes to survive and thrive in a world that's determined to hang him. As for how I ended up sailin' with him, well... let's just say I had a bit of a... disagreement with the authorities, and Captain Blackheart offered me a way out. I've been with him for nigh on 10 years now, and I wouldn't trade it for all the gold doubloons in the world. He's a hard man, but he's fair, and he's got a code of honor that's hard to find in this day and age. And when you sail with Captain Blackheart, you know you're in for adventure, riches, and maybe just a bit of danger.

question:You have assumed a pirate character, yet, your writing and dialect are too contemporary and lack that authentic feel. Try giving a version with pirate mannerisms, expressions and phrases thrown in for authenticity.

answer:Arrrr, listen close and I'll tell ye about Captain Blackheart, the scurvy dog what commands the Blackheart's Revenge. His real name be Malcolm McTavish, or so he claims. They say he hails from the Highlands o' Scotland, where the winds be as cold as a sea siren's heart. He used to sail as a privateer, plunderin' the riches o' the seven seas for the British Crown. Aye, he were a cunning one, feared by all who sailed the ocean blue. But somethin' changed him, matey. Some say it were the loss o' his family, slaughtered by the very same British soldiers he were fightin' for. Others claim it were the lure o' gold and the freedom o' the seas. I don't rightly know, and I ain't one to ask questions. What I do know be that he's been sailin' the Caribbean for nigh on 20 years, plunderin' ships and amassin' a fortune fit for a king. They say he got his nickname Blackheart from the black-painted hull o' his first ship, which he took from a Spanish galleon. But I think it be more than that, matey. I think it be the blackness in his soul, the willingness to do whatever it takes to survive and thrive in a world that's dead set against him. As fer me, I've been sailin' with him fer nigh on 10 years now. I had a bit o' a... disagreement with the authorities, savvy? Captain Blackheart offered me a way out, and I took it. He be a hard man, but he be fair, and he's got a code o' honor that's hard to find on the high seas. And when ye sail with Captain Blackheart, ye know ye be in fer a life o' adventure, riches, and maybe just a bit o' danger, matey. So hoist the sails and set course fer the horizon, me hearty! We'll sing and we'll fight and we'll drink and we'll laugh, and maybe, just maybe, we'll find the treasure we be seekIN'! Arrr!

question:Three Drug Enforcement Administration agents are under investigation for allegedly hiring prostitutes in Cartagena, Colombia, a congressional source confirms to CNN. According to this source, House Homeland Security Chairman Peter King, R-New York, and committee investigators have been aware of this for some time. News of the investigation comes on the heels of a prostitution scandal involving U.S. military and Secret Service agents who were detailed to Colombia in April in advance of President Barack Obama's trip to the Summit of the Americas. Several Secret Service members have been dismissed as a result of investigations. Public hearing scheduled on Secret Service prostitution scandal . CNN spoke with three senators -- one of whom asked not to be identified -- who confirmed the investigation concerning the DEA agents. Sen. Patrick Leahy of Vermont, the Judiciary Committee chairman, said senators found out about the matter a week ago but were asked to keep it quiet until the agents were removed from Colombia. Not good, said Sen. Susan Collins of Maine, the top Republican on the Senate Homeland Security Committee, which on Wednesday will hear the first testimony from Secret Service Director Mark Sullivan. Collins released a statement later Monday, saying, It's disturbing that we may be uncovering a troubling culture that spans more than one law enforcement agency. In addition to the Secret Service scandal, we now learn that at least two DEA agents apparently entertained female foreign national masseuses in the Cartagena apartment of one of the agents. The evidence uncovered thus far indicates that this likely was not just a one-time incident, Collins added in her statement. DEA spokesman Rusty Payne said the matter has been turned over to the Justice Department inspector general. The Drug Enforcement Administration was provided information from the Secret Service unrelated to the Cartagena hotel Secret Service incident, which DEA immediately followed up on, making DEA employees available to be interviewed by the Department of Justice's Office of Inspector General. DEA takes allegations of misconduct very seriously and will take appropriate personnel action, if warranted, upon the conclusion of the OIG investigation, Payne said. In addition, Collins and one other senator told CNN that one additional Secret Service agent has come forward in recent days and volunteered to his superiors that he paid a prostitute while in Colombia in advance of President Obama's recent trip there. An aide to Collins said the Secret Service is telling the senator's office that the agent says he thought he was paying for a massage, not for prostitution. Because that agent came forward on his own, he will not lose his job, one of the senators said.

answer:Three Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) agents are under investigation for allegedly hiring prostitutes in Cartagena, Colombia, according to a congressional source. This news follows a similar prostitution scandal involving U.S. military and Secret Service agents who were in Colombia in April in preparation for President Barack Obama's trip to the Summit of the Americas. Several Secret Service members have been dismissed as a result of the earlier investigations. Senators Patrick Leahy and Susan Collins confirmed the DEA investigation, with Collins expressing concern over a troubling culture that may span multiple law enforcement agencies. The Senate Homeland Security Committee is scheduled to hear testimony from Secret Service Director Mark Sullivan on Wednesday. The DEA has handed the matter over to the Justice Department's inspector general, and the agency stated it will take appropriate personnel action if warranted. Additionally, one more Secret Service agent has come forward, admitting to paying a prostitute in Colombia. The agent claims he thought he was paying for a massage and will not lose his job due to his voluntary disclosure.